Sunday, 23 December 2007


A long, long time ago
'dream your dreams...'

whispered my angel
from somewhere
so far, yet so near.

A long, long time ago
when my mind
was an open book...

clear, pure and
bright with hopes...

Quite, quite
unprepared for the bitter storms..
dark, desperate, dreaded storms

clouding and dimming
the fire that burned within.

But storms have
a way of blowing out,
whispered someone,

maybe my angel?
As I soon discovered,
leaving behind devastation
yet renewed hope,
in glowing embers.

Embers which you
fanned, to bring
back the warmth
into my life..

To hold the dream
once again.
To hope,
to yearn.

To believe in a
miracle called

20 April, '02


In the silence of
our words
is a greeting louder
than the tumultuous
beating of our hearts...

In the warmth of
our entwined fingers
is a reassurance
and a promise...

Love is only love
and is the only
thing we know...

And in the crescendo
of our silences
is the melting of
our souls -

We could never be

Usha, 26 Jan. '91


Only sorrow makes you whole

Endless joy, in surfeit
Weighs you down in breathless gasps

Or puts you on a hurdy-gurdy
of emotions , throwing you
inside out

in sheer reckless joy,
your inhibitions thrown to the winds
your defences down..
your vulnerability glaring...

Then sorrow strikes -
In One chilling moment,
dunked, as if in ice-cold water

Your armour is back.
Painful, digging at the
softest corner of your heart

Yet you feel whole...

All the pieces where they should be
Cold, yet strong.
Despairing, yet determined.
It's a thin line between
sorrow and joy.

But you're far better off
making sure you know sorrow
she takes care of you
she puts you together..
That's why you feel so..

I know...
Because only sorrow makes
you feel

Usha, 18 Oct., '03


Have you ever had a dream?
Felt it grow within-
In your heart…
Have you cherished it?
Nurtured it, and felt
its tangibility?
Have you believed so much
So very much in it….
That you let it take shape?

Nebulous, misty, gossamer…
Slowly defining itself
And you.

And when you reach
for that dream-come-true….
Is there any that compares
with that deep feeling
of emotion?
Overwhelmingly elated
With a sense of perfect completion!

Dream, reach, believe…
Only you can do it.
All it takes is faith!

Usha, 2003


Hanging on the edge of time
by a sliver of a thought.
An impossible dream.

Daring myself to plunge ahead
There am I poised.

And I step forward…

Through the icy blasts
of wordless reprimands
of guilt and remorse
of pain , tears
and shock-

I find the light
at the end of the tunnel.

Passion’s price paid
I stand now-
Resolute, content,
Peaceful and strong.

In life and love-
Bound by a circle of
Only love.


Déjà vu

A sense of
déjà vu -
was it
in that definable

But he was real -
And so is this feeling -
I know I've
been here
before -
Before with You
So far away in time
Yet not further
than a lingering memory.

For, time and time
I see you -
around me.

Usha, 27 February, '92

Saturday, 22 December 2007

august tidings

the rain powdered down
like fine sand thru' fingers
and caught in my hair
like dew drops
in a spider's web;

(only it wasn't so pretty!)

my thoughts
like fairies, fathomless in flight
delighted the mood.

9 August, '83

Pic Courtesy:

Faux Pas ( a mistake)

The river flows wantonly

The green is
On the other side..

I feel suspended in
Do I take the plunge?

On Judgement Day
If the scales tip against me,
I can only ask -

'Why did You make temptation so strong?
You made me - and You knew
I was only human.'

Usha, 13 April, '83

Friday, 21 December 2007

With you, always....

In the darkest hour
of night,
I will be your brightest star;
In the longest unending
road ahead,
I am there, walking beside you;

In the deepest sorrow
hanging heavy in your heart,

I am the unshed tear drops in your eyes;
In the quietest moment
of your loneliness....
Am I not there?
With my arms around you?

Every step, every breath
every moment...
my love
I am there, with you

Usha, 18 November, 2001

there's hope

deep,deep wells of sadness
in unforgotten memories
and unspoken words;
so much, so very much
we carry around.......
beasts of burden we are-
and haven't we always been?

and yet there's hope...
when we pool our sorrows
and envelop it in our love
in the surety, the certainty
in the wonder of our love.

Life may never be easy
Life may never be smooth
Life may never be peaceful
again. ever;
but Life will always be
with you in my thoughts,
with our love a tangible cloak
wrapped around us:
a cloak of the many colours of Life
that grows brighter, warmer,
drawing us into our innermost
depths - with love, in love.

Usha, 18 Nov. 01

Thursday, 20 December 2007

My Magic Child

They call her a square peg
She's my soft, simple primrose in
a garden of orchids.

She's their public joke
A helpless scapegoat caught in a
Cross-fire of the so-called sane.

And she's my pride:
A girl who makes me realize
The tangibility
The existential quality of

But even they make allowances.
They call her beautiful.
Yes, she's that...
Fine of face with
Large, long-lashed
Lackadaisical eyes.

That's what hits them.

And I love her-
Despite the fact that she'll never
understand it.

Because she'll always be in
Her own world;
That comforts, consoles her
When the outside world hurts.

They call her an autistic.
But she's my magic child.

Usha, 1984

Friday, 14 December 2007


my hand stretches out

unbiddingly -
to reach for the long slim


shaking fingers

burn it to life
scorching it
crumbling it to ashes

taking its breath away
to make me feel.

the white cloud

streams free -
after capture in
rotting lungs.

I know-
I know-
my time has come
as it meant to
crushed out like the
last remains of a long

slim cigarette

the hot orange
stifled to grey ash

And still I do it
Dear god -
Still I do it.

7 March, '84

Wednesday, 12 December 2007


Like the brilliance
a shower of broken glass;
Like the riot of colour
at the peak of spring;
Like the music of a hundred
different birds, sounding together;
Like a pleading cry of an
unloved child
And the desolate heart of
a lonely lover
And a whispering look of an
unwanted pup...

I see myself shatter
blowing my fuse
exploding into a million pieces
deep inside - We

Usha, 11 March '84




Flounce your tutu
My Child
Of Self confidence
Perched on the toes
Of the Faith in yourself!

I watch you
Dear One,
Sure that you
Can do it!

I urge you silently
Shed that fear...
And do the pointe...
Step up on your toes


Ah yes! Let your
Hands lift, so gently,
Curve upwards.

And I hold my breath...
The first step-
Swaying, dipping,
A flourish...

And then,

You give me the magic
In that leap-
And the pirouette-
Spinning, and spinning...



Then you curtsy.
Your smile,
in wonder,
When you look at me

Says it All!!

And all I want to say is-
I told you so!

Usha, December 11, 2007

Sunday, 9 December 2007

The Impossible Dream

To dream the impossible dream
To fight the unbeatable foe
To bear with unbearable sorrow
To run where the brave dare not go

To right the unrightable wrong
To love pure and chaste from afar
To try when your arms are too weary
To reach the unreachable star

This is my quest
To follow that star
No matter how hopeless
No matter how far

To fight for the right
Without question or pause
To be willing to march into Hell
For a heavenly cause

And I know if I'll only be true
To this glorious quest
That my heart will lie peaceful and calm
When I'm laid to my rest

And the world will be better for this
That one man, scorned and covered with scars
Still strove with his last ounce of courage
To reach the unreachable star


These are the inspiring words of the song from the film, The Man from La Mancha, the story of Don Quixote... for me a Knight Extraordinaire...

A song that fills me up everytime I listen to it, and makes me want to put in that much more of myself in all that I do... Here it is, a rare clip from the film itself....I hope it will move you too, in the same way...:)


Saturday, 1 December 2007

A Salute!

More precious than the
Moment I held you
In my arms-

More dearer than the
Moment I watched you
Take that first step-

More firmer my faith
Than that moment
You chose your path ahead;

Biting back my gasps;
But making sure you knew
My hand was there-
To hold and guide and support and comfort....

For, only you know-
How torturous the road was;
To this threshold you now are at,
Sailing rough waters.

To pass under that

I saw you
Proud, straight-
The perfect salute;
The smile that played
on your lips.

This mother now,
With pride anew in you,
Hands you over, to our Mother;

With the deepest respect;
For, more precious, more dear
Are you now.

And more firmer my faith
In all that you will do.

A Salute to you
My son!!

Usha, 1 December, '07

Tuesday, 20 November 2007

Double - speak

Wheels within wheels
Lines between lines
Persons inside persons

So many innuendos

silences that gouge
deep gaping wounds

Lavished briefly
with a salve of
sweet words

And then you're
back to being a
stone man -
stone-heart, stone-mind

With a double edged knife
to twist in my soul

I am
after all

Usha, 2 Apr, '91

Monday, 19 November 2007

The Liminal

To look at life

beyond that distant horizon
is something I love to do-

In the liminal spaces abounding.

Of your gaze, in which
I see times past, and
The promise of future.

Of that child’s laughter
pulling me along in its wake-
A delight, sheer joy in innocence,
Back to a time, when nothing soured.

In that bolt of lightning
which rips apart the sky.
and gives a glimpse, being a window
To power and beauty, incomparable, of nature!

In that word on a page
which in itself opened up
a thousand possibilities-
of use, abuse and experience!

Of a friend, or maybe a stranger,
who takes you places,
knowingly, unknowingly
On to that threshold
you never knew was there.

Through the ink
that is the medium
for the soul to express itself-
bare and raw, in all its glory.

But most of all, the Liminal Space
of finally not being-
when the eyes close, deeper into the self
flying above all earthly bonds-

When I am the Liminal
for my own soul.

Usha, 15 August ‘07

This is one write that is inspired by a young man named Arun, who shared with me some really
awesome pages from an excellent blogger, one of whose pages are to be found in this link.

The word Liminal just refused to leave my mind, and that is why it is here... writing itself through these words. Thanks again, Arun!

A Quest!

To live upon
that distant dream,
that one day
I shall find me!

To sleep upon that
cushioned memory
that has yet to be
a part of me-

To sing that song
whose music long ago
I heard - though the
words are yet to speak-

To walk along that
road - myself and me;
And I and we.

That coming together,
in that union of myself-
That sense of finally
being born-

The curtain then
shall fall;
Replete shall I be.

Just I.
In Eternity.

Usha, 21 July, '07


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